Homecoming, Ormond-by-the-Sea, Oct. 4, 2024

I returned home yesterday, Oct. 4. It was day 25 of my stay at Advent Health Daytona Beach. The fresh air was bracing, although the temp was a warm 85. It felt like heaven to me.

Chris was driving. It will be awhile before I’m confident enough to get behind the wheel. I have my Florida driver’s license and about 58 years experience behind the wheel. I just don’t have my wits about me. I just got over a nasty case of septicemia or blood poisoning. I read all the physician and nurses’ notes in my online chart. A potent staph infection from a leg would had entered my bloodstream and propagated until it caused my body to seize up and stopped my heart – twice. Due to quick action by my wife Chris, The ER staff came running, pulled me back from the brink, and I began what I guess I can call my healing journey. It really was a giant shit sandwich that’s still going to take a couple months to recover from.

First the good news: Here I am. I need a walker to get around but I’m getting around, slowly. Seems that when my body got whacked by microscopic bugs, it forgot how to take one step after the other. I’m one of the lucky ones. First, I will walk again probably with help. Second, I’m still on Planet Earth to do so. Maybe that’s first, I still get a bit confused by priority lists. When I first awoke in ICU, I had no idea where I was nor who I was. Well, I knew my name but that’s about it.

Nurse: "What month is it?"

Me: "Uh..."

Nurse: "Do you know the month?"

Me: "August?"

Nurse: "Close. September."

The last half of my hospital stay was in the excellent Advent Health Therapy Center which occupies the entire 12^th floor of Advent Daytona.  The staff is first-rate: physicians, nurses, techs, physical and occupational therapists. When you go to the twelfth floor, you sign up for OT and PT for four to five hours daily. You’re assigned exercises to do in your room. The nurses are always there to help and a more empathetic yet stern bunch would be hard to find. I love them all.

My first task after I got out was to round up a seafood meal that was on the healthy side and sit down with my wife at home and enjoy. My choice was the planked salmon dinner at Stonewood Grill & Tavern with shrimp and scallop skewers on the side. I didn’t so much eat it as swim through it. A pleasurable swim to be sure, one topped off by Key Lime Pie. It was a big deal because Chris and I arrived in Ormond Beach on August 24 and were busy getting organized until Sept. 9 when venomous bacteria came to call. I had not had a single seafood meal nor had I been to the beach. There was a big old ocean out there but it might as well have been Wyoming’s Red Desert.

So I’m home. Now what?

Even cyborgs need periodic battery replacements

I’ve been recovering from heart surgery since Feb. 16. It was Valentine’s Day Week and it seemed like a good time for it. Heart surgery has an ominous sound. Thoughts go to quadruple bypasses and aortic valve replacement. I just needed a replacement generator in my chest to stop any signs of ventricular fibrillation which can lead to death. The gadget is filled with microchips and wires that connect to leads that snake down into my heart. I got my first one ten years ago after a widowmaker heart attack that almost did me in. Because it took too long to get help for my stopped-up heart, it sustained some muscle damage which in turn made my heart less effective. Up until January 2013, my heart had been very good to me. In high school, it pumped like a champ as I ran down the basketball court or when a girl looked at me in a certain way. Got me through my adult years until I hit 62 then BAM! Damn…

So the first one wore out and I needed a new one. I am on Medicare and have secondary insurance that pay for the $23,000 gizmo and attendant expenses such as doctor’s fees, OR fees, nursing services, etc. I am lucky to have health care insurance that keeps me ticking. Health insurance is a right and should not be optional. I see that our esteemed GOP state legislators have once again torpedoed Medicaid expansion that would insure thousands of Wyomingites. A widowmaker strikes and you need help? Tough luck, buddy. For the GOP it’s all about the cruelty. They didn’t used to announce their cruelties for all the world to see and hear. Now they shout it from the rooftops.

Back to my trip to the operating room. It’s called the CRMC Cath Lab and it’s where the electrophysiologists work their magic. I was under conscious sedation, like the kind you get for your colonoscopy. In this case, the surgeon applied a topical anesthesia and then pumped me with Fentanyl but not too much. He then cut into my chest, removed the old battery and in with the new. Then he sealed me back up. Before you know what’s going on, I'm being whisked off to recovery.

So how does my electrophysiologist keep track of the signals beamed from my Abbott Laboratories ICD? I used to have a Merlin Home Transmitter the size of the big black phones you used to see in 1940s movies. It sat by the side of my bed and beamed my readings to the CRMC Device Clinic. My new monitor is a Samsung device, smaller than a smart phone, that I can take anywhere. Pretty slick.

My new machine should last 5-7 years, according to the pamphlet that accompanied it. I plan on lasting at least that long. Seven days post-op and I’m doing fine.

Thank you, modern technology and surgical expertise. 

Two years ago I reviewed a nonfiction book about ICDs on WyoFile. It's "Lightning Flowers" and written by Wyoming author Katherine E. Standefer. She needed a device while still in her 20s and then set out to find the its origins. A great tale, whether you're a cyborg or not. 

Strong mind, strong body -- take your pick

Just added to my reading list: "Blue Dreams: The science and the story of the drugs that changed our minds" by Lauren Slater. I will tackle it once I finish "Lincoln in the Bardo" by George Saunders.

"Blue Dreams" is a non-fiction account of psychiatric drugs and their effects by someone who is both a patient and a psychologist.

"Lincoln in the Bardo" is a novel that explores something that seems a lot like severe depression and PTSD in Abraham Lincoln, who is mourning the death of his 11-year-old son, Willie, in 1862.

Would Lincoln have benefited from a regimen of Prozac or other SSRIs? Perhaps. Maybe he would have recovered from his dark moods more quickly with a couple hits of Molly or LSD.

We'll never know. But psychedlics figure into Slater's book. Party drug MDMA (Molly) has been tested on those with PTSD. It has shown some remarkable and lasting results. As Slater recently described it on NPR's "Fresh Air:" those who take Molly and relive their trauma are able to shift that experience into another section of the brain, possibly the prefrontal cortex, helping remove it from the "fight or flight" amygdala. They can then get a handle on a horrible memory without degenerating into bouts of anxiety or self-harm, even suicide.

Slater wonders if this experimentation may lead to another golden age of drug therapy. The previous golden age brought on by lithium and Prozac may be nearing its end. Slater testifies that medications have helped her stay sane, raise a family and write books. They also have shortened her life.

That's the trade-off. So goes the old witticism: "Sound mind. Sound body. Take your pick." After five stays in psychiatric facilities between the ages of 13 to 24, Slater's doctors discovered Prozac. In a rush of Seratonin-laced good will, she finsihed finished her education, married, had two children and embarked on a writing career.

Then came trouble, in the form of the return of depression  and the start of her use of Zyprexa, which caused her to gain weight and lose her libido.

We patients are guinea pigs. Researcher still don't know the inner workings of these drugs. And their long-term effects. If you are in the midst of a severe depression, you want immediate help. Doesn't happen. Prozac or Zoloft may alleviate the symptoms eventually. Studies have shown that two-thirds  of those with depression would recover just as well with a placebo. That's depressing enough. Add side-effects into the mix and you have to wonder what in the hell we are doing.

I have been taking antidepressants for almost 30 years. I feel better, go off them, and crash. One of my psychiatrists once lectured me: "You have to stay on these the rest of your life. You have depression."

That made an impression. Unfortunately, I don't always listen. I went off my Zoloft six years ago and the walls came crashing down. I was out of work for a month. My psychiatrist at the time, who fled Wyoming for Hawaii one winter and never came back, tried a return to Zoloft and then several other meds. We finally went back to Prozac with a nighttime dose of Remeron. Several months later, I felt better but also was back exercising on a regular basis and eating right, which helped. Also, I was in talk therapy with a therapist and regularly saw my psychiatrist. Still, that summer I was still experiencing bouts of depression interspersed with anxiety. It probably took a good six months for my moods to stabilize.

Six months later, on Jan. 2, 2013, I had a heart attack. I recovered quicker from a "widow maker" than I did from depression. Got more help, too. Add an inept mental health care system to the fact that the docs know so little about the drugs and the human mind. That makes for a killer cocktail of ignorance. At least I have both Medicare and private insurance which enables me to navigate the system without going broke.

But I am not only here to complain. I am here to critique books. "Lincoln in the Bardo" is a wild ride and I'm only on page 98. This is how an award-winning short story writer writes a novel. Truly unique. I am a short story writer working on a novel. I find encouragement in Saunders work.

I have ordered Slater's book. I, too, would like to know what happens with long-term use of these drugs. My life depends on it.

Healthcare march and forum set for Feb. 25 in Cheyenne

How many marches, rallies and rabble-rousing events can one be expected to attend before collapsing in a heap?

That's what people are asking themselves. In normal times, exhaustion already would have settled in. But these are abnormal times. Protests seem to have a bigger impact than just getting on the phone to your elected reps or mailing them a postcard. Trump got to the White House via the adulation of crowds. He will be ushered out of the White House the same way. So, here are a few more ways for concerned citizens to gather together to stump Trumpism which is a mean-spirited, destructive philosophy that will ruin our country.

Healthcare march on Saturday, Feb. 25, 10 a.m., Depot Plaza in downtown Cheyenne, 16th St. and Capitol Ave. Free. Bring a sign. FMI: https://www.facebook.com/events/1348316418561808/

Save the Affordable Care Act forum on Saturday, Feb. 25, 3-6 p.m., at the Laramie County Public Library, 2200 Warren Ave., downtown Cheyenne. Free. FMI: https://www.facebook.com/events/1861553744059620/

Here's a short description:

Do you want to know what is included in the Affordable Care Act? Are you worried about having health insurance for you or your family? Would you like more information about the Affordable Care Act? Are you wondering what "pre-existing conditions" means? Do you have children covered on your health insurance who are young adults? Come and find out these details & more!

Refreshments will be served.

Joan McCarter on DKos: 'Greatest retirement crisis' in history looms large

As is often the case, Joan McCarter is one step ahead the rest of us on timely topics. Today it's the retirement crisis facing American Baby Boomers. And I'm not just saying this because I am one of those Boomers on the verge of retirement. Check out Joan's Daily Kos column here and the daily schedule for our fellow Kossacks posting about the topic this week.

Note to Wyoming Sens. Enzi and Barrasso and Rep. Lummis: NO CUTS!

Overpass Light Brigade posted this: From the San Diego Labor Council's candlelight event outside Sen. Dianne Feinstein's downtown office to avoid cuts to Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid programs; instead to pressure Congress to raise taxes on the wealthiest 2% of Americans. NO CUTS!

Tea Party Slim's new bumper sticker: "Wyoming: Love it Unquestionably or Leave It"

I let a few weeks pass before bringing up the election.

"I don't want to talk about it," said Tea Party Slim.

"I understand." I finished off my pumpkin scone. "Bad memories."

He sipped his coffee. "Water under the bridge."

We sat at a small table at the downtown Starbuck's. Two weeks after the historic election. Four more years of Barack Hussein Obama probably looked like an eternity to Slim.

"Is your family well?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yours?"

"Just dandy. What you doing for Thanksgiving?"

"Wife cooking up a storm, as always. Having over a few friends. Son coming up from Denver with his family."

"That's nice."

"Yes it is. You?"

"Kids will be home. We're taking everything over a sick friend's house. She's been in the hospital but can't cook."

Slim sipped his coffee. "That's nice."

"Yes it is."

"Good thing she had insurance, and thank goodness for Medicare. There were complications."

I could tell Slim wanted to say something, maybe a comment about Medicare running out of money and maybe it should be privatized. Instead, he just said, "I hope she gets well soon."

"She's doing better." I sipped my coffee. "Wonder what the State of Wyoming plans to do about the Affordable Care Act?"

"Obamacare," snorted Slim.

At last! "State doesn't do something, get a health exchange going or something similar, feds will step in and run it."

"Federal government can't run anything."

"Not even the military?" I knew this was a sore spot, him being a veteran and all.

"Don't go picking on the military now," Slim said. "It's one thing we do right."

"I'm just saying..."

"You're not a veteran," he said. "I was protecting the U.S.A. while you were a party boy in college, buying kegs with your student loan."

"I never thought of that, Slim. I was probably too busy working two jobs."

Slim harrumphed. "Just don't pick on the military."

"Let's make a deal, Slim. I won't pick on the military and you lay off Medicare and Social Security and state employee pensions."

"Why should I pay for state employee pensions? And why should you get pensions while private sector employees don't?"

"Let's put the shoe on the other foot, Slim. Why should I pay for military pensions and the V.A.?"

"Because we've put in our time and that's part of the deal -- serve your country and you get benefits."

"I could say the exact same thing about my 20-something years as a state employee. I've put in my time, including many years without a raise, and I've contributed to the defined benefits plan. When I retire, I expect benefits."

"You can't compare serving your country with serving the state."

"Why not?"

"It's different, that's all. People put their lives on the line. You're a paper pusher."

"True. But how often was your life in danger? And how much paper did you push around?"

"It was Vietnam..."

"You were off the coast on a big ship, were you not?"

"True..."

"Were you ever actually in Vietnam?"

"Well...."

"Never?"

"We had to arm the planes that went on bombing runs. Dangerous work."

"I'm sure it was." I finished my coffee. "I don't question that. I am thankful you get a pension and can go to the V.A. when needed. So why do you want me to face retirement without a pension and medical coverage?"

"I didn't say that."

"That's what your Tea Party Republican legislators want to do."

"They just want fairness, that's all."

"Look, employers in the private sector want to pay less than minimum wage and no benefits. They get ticked off when they train people and they go to work for the state. Meanwhile, the state can't hire much-needed staff because Wyoming wages are ridiculously low and our legislature is the embarrassment of the nation."

"If you don't like it, you can always retire and move to blue-state Colorado."

"Love it or leave it?"

"I used to have that on a bumper sticker."

"I don't doubt it. Maybe you need a new one, Slim. How about "'Wyoming: Love It Unquestionably Or Leave it?"

"Not bad."

"I know another slogan that might be better."

"What?"

"Wyoming: You Can't Eat the Scenery."

Call in and ask Sen. Enzi about GOP plans to ensure healthy retirements for Wyomingites

Laramie's Nancy Sindelar is a great source for intriguing political happenings around the state. She just alerted me about this:

Thursday, November 15, 7 p.m., Wyoming PBS presents "Wyoming Perspectives: the Future of Medicare and Social Security." This is a discussion with Republican Sen. Mike Enzi; Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services spokesperson Mike Fierberg; University of Wyoming professor and economist Anne Alexander; AARP Vice President/Financial Security Jean Setzfand; and AARP Wyoming Director Tim Summers. This is a live call-in show, or you can watch archived copy afterwards. FMI: http://www.wyomingpbs.org/seniors. Email jamend@cwc.edu. Ask live on-air questions: 1-800-495-9788 or wyomingperspectives@wyomingpbs.org. Twitter @WyoPBS, #WyoPBSseniors. 

My first question to Sen. Enzi: Now that the Republican plans for privatizing Social Security and turning Medicare into a voucher system are as dead as Paul Ryan's budget, how do you plan to spend your time in D.C.? And then there's that little question about avoiding the fiscal cliff. How does the GOP plan to deal with that little issue, eh?