Monday, April 27, 2009

Cheney and Yellowstone wolves prowl Wyoming

Dear Democratic Party of the USA:

I understand that you are still trying to raise $202 to send former Veep and Unrepentant Scourge of Humanity Dick Cheney back to Wyoming.

How goes the fund-raising? I'm sure that Marylanders are excited, as it will rid them of Cheney. But Donald Rumsfeld will remain. How can you get rid of one scourge but leave the other one in the neighborhood? Your strategy is flawed.

Let's leave Cheney where we can keep an eye on him. Once he gets loose in Wyoming, there's no telling where he may end up. You know the story of the wolves released into Yellowstone. The National Park Service told the wolves two things: don't wander out of the park boundaries and don't kill any cows or Republicans. Did the wolves listen? No, they have wandered far and wide. There were reports last week that the carcass of a Yellowstone wolf was found in northwestern Colorado. Panic gripped Casper last week. A wolf pack had been spotted and alarums raised throughout Natrona County. One elderly resident of Casper swears that she saw a Yellowstone wolf sipping a pina colada at a downtown bar. His hair was perfect.

On the second count, the wolves have killed a number of cows. No Republicans -- human variety -- have fallen victim to wolf predation. It is, however, a matter of time.

See how difficult it is to corral a predator once it's let loose back into the wild? It's entirely possible that the former Veep will not stay put in his mountain redoubt but will prowl the territory, looking for fresh Democratic blood. He will have many choices in Jackson. But once he wanders outside Teton County into the Repub strongholds of Sublette and Lincoln counties, he may very well end up like the wolf that starved to death in Colorado.

Please, keep Cheney where he can be tagged and observed. You owe that to the citizenry of Wyoming, especially the Dems who worked so hard to elect Barack Obama.


Fairly Frightened in WYO

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